Family Affair ? ( Water)

I left the city  for a week however, before I left, I had  lunch with one of my friends that I consider my brother.  I  bought my first pair of Christian Louboutin shoes. He laughed and stated he was glad that his girlfriend was not into that stuff. I told him that I would give this all up if  I had someone worth giving it up for.

I then went  away .  I went to see my  brother and his family. His family consists of his wife and 2 adorable children. I went with my parents who have been married for over 40 years.   So  we all went to visit the simple life. Slower paced but amazing none the less. I sat back and watched my brother with his wife and my parents .  What both couples had in common that I saw is  a solid friendship and respect for one another.  It wasn't about  my brother or my father buying  my sis-in-law and my mother expensive  clothing or shoes-it was something far stronger and less tangible.

I watched as  I helped to take care of my nieces, and watched  their grand parents and their parents  care for them and how wonderful this is. I think about how I would throw away my  shoe  collection, various expensive hairstyles and go back to giving myself my own manicure and pedicure  if it meant  I could have a family. I mean my family is great , but i mean a family of my own . I  would like a hand picked partner and a family and life that we built together.  I  think about washing dishes , cleaning and cooking all with a smile on my face because I executed this plan for myself.  I am somewhat uneasy  when I say I would not mind being a stay at home mother. I'm not saying that there is something wrong with that. BUT I am saying, I went to school for all these years and I'm  pursuing a professional degree . I know in my heart that i would drop it all for a family.  The older I get,  The stronger this feeling gets.

I have an affair in my mind on my life . In the affair, I am the domestic princess. Staying home , running a daycare from my house so I could watch the kids .  I cheat on my single and loving it life. But I guess everyone is entitled to their fantasies .   So in my mind I will have my family affair.